Trash Day

Stuff: What we have to have, what we buy, what we may use, what we throw away.

All that brand new shiny stuff that we “Can’t live without” is on the way to the dump. IT takes more than a sane amount of time, to go from store to landfill, but it__IS__ on the way in less than a billionth of a second after the cash register rings!

Have you noticed that trash, junk, impedimenta, objects we trip over____breeds at night? When the lights are out, your stuff is breeding, multiplying…making baby stuff that grows up and become big people stuff. Stuff comes from the exponential evolutionary process of reproducing, NOT from buying more than you need to survive! You’re WAY too smart to do something that stupid.

What about the golf swing? Magazine tips, buddy tips, video tips, Golf Channel tips, Book tips, Daughters of the American Revolution tips! Golf tips have been breeding in golfers skulls since St. Andrew, causing an addiction to prescription drugs and booze. Time to throw out what some opportunist sold you! Sold is past tense, sell is present tense. Sell eventually becomes sold and sold means something owns…. YOU! Yes You, your shaving Buddy.

The Hugely HUGE problem, according to the anointed, knighted, and legendary soothsayer of the 21th Century…Throne wearer of GOLFDOM, IS.. Golfers have REAL TRASH breeding in their skulls! How much is Too much…In round figures?___Roughly 99.999 to the 10th power!

Time to chuck all the ridiculous nonsense in the golf swing. Pitch it in the Trash Can and wheel it out to the curb. It will become the trash mans problem. YOU, free at last, will play better golf and quite possibly marry the filthy rich fairy princess who loves rainy day matinees in her BIG feather bed. Did I mention she is ____ “stacked”?!

Jim McLellan, Juan & Own Lee, Le “Anti-Pro”

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